Misplaced Talents

If you walk like a quack, talk like a quack – odds prevail that you are a ‘duck’ … well, think again !!! Office secretary you see every day that walks talks and looks more like a ramp model. Quite often do I see people around putting forward arguments like a professional lawyer: “I am not saying that …” and my heart cries out “then don’t say what you are not saying, just say what you want to say… moron “. This is not a court and you are not a lawyer, then why sound like one! Why to keep an axe in your hands when your job is to grow trees,… that is the point!

Similarly, there are some inborn politicians and diplomats looking for opportunities to shine their skills: identify a just person and start campaign, don’t tell me that you never met one. ‘ Learn some diplomacy’ I get unsolicited advice from experts ,for them I am an arrogant fool who does not merges , but does that matter when I prefer to be a fool over a hypocrite.

There is another category that I call “Prophets of Uncertainty”, they are gifted with worse kind of abilities to dilute every valid argument in a discussion because ‘Doubt is their product’ … yep, you got it! Their trademark is to bring in all feeble probabilities into play – may be or probably or we don’t know or how can we be sure or it’s the way you see it- no matter the logic is written on wall or visible to blind through iron curtains …, I believe there is a huge demand for such talent.

No wonder, people have hobbies and there is a reason we all have them – we could practise all that which attracts us and we can’t do otherwise. Well, I believe it’s okay to practise talents wherever you want and whatever you want as long as it does not hurt … but wrong things at wrong places will always hurt.Watch out for some exceptionally talented people around … Good luck.

Aaaaaaaaaaaachooooo !

I am surprised by people contracting their brains to bottoms for simply suppressing a “sneeze”. No offence ladies, but many of you make  the most weird   ” pheeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaannn…”  sound ever heard on planet earth otherwise.

Nothing is wrong with ‘achoo’  if you do it in your arm-pocket or in a manner that contains your release ! Why worry much about the sound ,Who stops you , come on make that blast and wake up all those sleeping in the presentation …  !

Lets dump the old style, stigmatic association of sneeze with ‘body’s way to drive out evil spirits’. Come on fellas , just  give  me one  ’spirit’, holy or unholy, that wants to bathe in you nasal slime before coming to this world !!

I really feel blessed after getting a ‘bless you’ from someone unknown , but remember there is no direct wire running from your nose to heart valves controlling blub-dubs, and the heart stops for nothing except … well , you know

The only hazard  is when you are driving and it closes your eyes for split seconds … make it loud and you will see your eyes opening quickly , but carry a handkerchief  to clean windshield afterwards.

Just think about the pressure you try to direct inwards guys , isn’t it better to sneeze than die from brain hemorrhage !!

My heart blooms like a flower when I hear a flu caught beauty sitting on back desks in my class, blowing a full-serve in her paper napkin , that is the way to go baby , keep it up !!!

So my advise is to let it come and go at same speed , there is nothing high-society in slowing it down , believe me.

Speaking with Silence

I have never been good at listening to anything more than ‘silence’ , and yet I have met very few people in life who know how to speak with it !

I have always tried to find such people , intentionally gone beyond the line, said something to elicit a response ; 99 % of the time I got explanations, counter-arguments, criticisms or useless rants in return … and only the rare 1 % of time I have found someone who just looked into my eyes , said everything without  saying a word …

Believe me, there are people who can give you the most important lesson of your life without saying a word… all that it takes is a heart to listen.

Yeah , tell me when you come across one … remember I am not talking about love here, girls may be  :)

Funny kind-of weird may be gross whats-up cool

I told my old time engineer friend , who is moving to Canada next year , to just understand by heart these ‘seven wonders’ that will help him better in his integration than the programs for new immigrants.  I warned him against using his old-colonial British style-text book English. He is confused.

I told him not to say me ‘please’ in my car or I will mind for being equated to a cabbie .Well, while I drove cab and saved money for my school tuition I thought people were so nice and friendly to me all the time, I did not know that I am just being recognized as a cabbie, every time … funny ehh.

So there is another side of words and not just the face value , that my new friend needs to understand.Last time when somebody said me ‘amazing’, I thought I did not do anything that was ‘really’ amazing , saying ‘good’ was OK. But when it comes to appreciation , you are supposed to be very-very generous. My friend laughed his *ss out when I said that he will be recognized as ‘awesome’ person if he knows how to change tissue roll in toilet or ‘the best’ if he mops floor well in his first job at McDonald’s.

I warned him against the worst kind of illusion , don’t just get your heart bumping and pounding if a beautiful girl calls ‘thanks my man’ while hugging you and slightly pressing you against her breast and saying ‘good night’ after school or work ( especially if you gave her a ride to bus stop) It is Nothing, Nothing at all,  just Normal … you don’t know if her tattooed  boy-friend is waiting right where your dropped her … or has a long-distance-relationship lawyer friend in another city, no matter dating a new women everyday. My friend did not believe , well he will once he is here.

I simply told him not to go after the literary mean of every sentence , he may be deceived. Howsoever true /honest the feelings may be , learn to cap it or better euphemise. Be silent, enigmatic , unpredictable , ignoring. Plug those silly buds in your ears and don’t listen to birds , blowing winds, talking people , playing kids , laughing teens , people walking on snow … cocoon yourself from everything , everybody.

What to tell him , I personally have a bad habit of looking at people’s faces and appreciate the beauty , variety, different features – his creation ; I like making eye to eye contact and smile as it makes me feel that I am a human living among humans. The kid in my heart talks nonsense and sometimes I don’t discipline him. May be I need some more time to get cultured, perhaps.

Oh yes, this was a write about “phrase imagery or sentence stereotypes”, apart from some other things.

OH is just a lot of ‘commonsense’ , and some science …

Why they put noise badge on shoulder , commonsense it is close to ears. Why to tape the pump tubings on worker attire , because if they hang,  from a loop ,may possibly get hooked and pulled. Why sometimes just the sound and vibration of  a running pump tells how efficient or charged it may be , not hard to guess. Why I need to clean my cyclone dust sampler , silly it may have dust from previous sampling. Why should I wear hard hat , gloves and respirator – man you will get exposed to bad stuff . Why safety is important to me, otherwise you will die at work from injury or years later from exposure. why Inspector slapped me an administrative penalty , fool you were putting your employees in danger at work.

Why am I not putting question marks after my question , come on guys I am writing answers right after … see I told you …its all just commonsense ( taking 20 months and $40 K , to get-in

Necessary-Accessory

Some days back while sampling for hazards at airport, I told one of my buddies that some information is core information that is more important than other accessory information. Perhaps I convinced her , but not myself , yet. I think all information is important irrespective its necessary or accessory to the scope of work you are doing. It is actually your requirement that you pick only the required data from your collected data for your interpretation and analysis.

But it does not mean that the focus should shift from the vital data on which results are actually based. Any data without which results can be explained is accessory data in my opinion and it should not take more than 50 % of the total effort that goes in collecting information.

Though in my little experience , I have found my results pointing in direction that was verbally told to me a worker at a workplace and I noted it in a corner in my notebook ; I ended up supporting that bit with pages of my discussion.I believe that always Believe in workers and decades of experience they carry , try to learn from them , bend the information and  see if it gives you any direction !

I more than believe , good strategies to find workplace hazards do not just need creating stylish matrices , looking at partly relevant articles, sitting with your fancy apple and looking good on paper. No , it needs more than that , it needs spending time at the workplace doing nothing but observing and talking to people on ground understanding flow of work, all crests and troughs spread over time, looking into history of workplace. All workplaces doing similar things are not similar for exposures.

Want to do ‘real’ hygiene , get your hands dirty collecting all necessary and other information.Actually, don’t worry much about what is more important and what is less in early stages !Though , in later stages you will realize that there is always some  information that is more important than other … funny … ehh